January 27th, 2005

(no subject)

So, I have decided to become a republican. I know that this may be alarming to some of you, but I have been reading the Jerry Falwell emails that someone signed me up for, and in so doing, realized that I needed to ask Jesus into my heart and begin defending his cause against those people who have loose morals and do things that seem gross or disgusting because it has been so difficult to live in a world with such horrible realitites. I hope you will all understand, and will not take my reports of some of you as terrorists personally. They aren't about you, really, they are about me.

(no subject)

D&J, can we go ahead and get cable? There are some nature shows that would probably improve my understanding of animal form for painting, and I've been thinking about it for a while, and it would also be a good addition to spending more family time together. What do you think?

(no subject)

Okay, concept yanked from Cadhla.

Iron Poet, Amalthea style.

Iron poet. Well, so the idea is this. You give me three words. I give you literature. Okay, originally it was poetry, but why limit it to that? So a short story, literary non-fiction or poem depending on my random whim and your relative absurdity.

The rules:

1. You must give me three words. This part isn't optional. I know many of you are sick and twisted people, and that it would be a fun game to see if you could totally baffle me, but that isn't the point. The point is to give me external stimulus to trigger initiating writing to get me sorta back into the swing of things, and for you to get 30 seconds of fame as the source for genius. :) I expect you to select words you actually want to see something about, rather than trying to be arbitrarily difficult. Groups of two or more words, like 'green mile' or 'hairy butt' still count as two or more words.

2. You can suggest a form (such as poem or stories), mood, genre (fantasy, horror, children's poems)and even a style within those if you choose, assuming your words were not sadistic and/or impossible to the format chosen. I am the final judge of what is or is not sadistic, and while I will generally give preference to those additional suggestions in most cases, blinding brilliance and occassionally random sanity preserving whim will necessitate the choice of something other than your suggestions. Sadism in the form of conflicting suggestions will often cause words to be discarded except when you manage to hit my very odd sense of humor just right. Sufficiently archane, pedantic, esoteric suggestions that would make the peice an unnecessary burden on the reader will generally be ignored. So just because you know how to ask for a hendecasyllabic sapphic stanza which also functions entirely within iambic tetrameter, doesn't mean you'll get it. Instead you will usually get ignored for being an insane twink who should be beaten with a large tome of literature. Clear?

3. I will not write acrostics, limericks, poems which depend on a visual layout or any style which by definition will take me more than the available time in a couple of days to do complete the peice, which may well limit your fasciation with epics and physics related subject matter.

4. I will only guarentee attention to word groups placed in original comments, rather than replies to someone else's comment for reasons of the impracticality of wading through occassional runaway threads and to create ease of retreival.

5. I do have other things to do with my life at the same time, many of which hold a much higher priority. So while I will work through them and attend to any which are not tossed out for reasons of sadism, pain induced in me as the writer (bad pain, not funny pain) or unavoidable risks of some kind in positing about them publicly (or any other reason listed above), I will not manage to do so quickly necessarily. Anyone who chooses to include an email address in their (or each of their) lists of words will get an email with a link to the work they triggered when that peice is put up. As a matter of security of your email addresses, I suggest putting at least one arbitrary space in the address when posted, and will edit same out when using it so that you do not get a swarm of bot spam. Other than that, let's see what y'all got. Remember that I have very very few sacred cows, and I am willing to dabble in things like children's works that some might not tackle with such a challenge, so do not arbitrarily limit yourself unnecessarily, but try to stay far enough within the bounds of approximate broad reasonableness so that you aren't simply ignored.

[Editor's note: If it was not clear, you are allowed more than one submission as long as they are sincere and not just twinkery.]